While the season finale of Grey’s Anatomy was on, I was attending the Mommybites Summit in NYC for parents and expectant parents.  It was a lovely evening of learning, meeting new friends, and adult time. I attended with my sister.   We got to hear some amazing speakers,  and learn about some great new products.   Parenting topics from green living,  child safety, parenting in social media age, and more  you could find something for every parents interests.

HalRunkel from Screamfree Parenting was the keynote speaker.  He was a great,  inspiring really got me to think about how I am not responsible for my kids.  I can’t wait to read more about his methods in Scream Free Parenting book.

Here are some quick parenting points that Hal said that stuck with me.

• I am responsible to my children  not for them .. there behavior they own
• I am going to walk shoulder to shoulder with my kids as a tour guide.  You have to let them make mistakes or they will never learn
• Our job as parents is to stay calm
• Put on your own oxygen mask first take care of yourself first to be an affective parent

AliciaYbarbo & Mary Ann Zoellner the TodaysMom spoke on Work Life Balance.    Both women, work as producers on the Today show.  These 2 amazing ladies are balancing family and working full time at a high profile jobs.   We also got a glimpse of the dynamics of the Today show.  *Al Roker is apparently great at documenting his kids life taking photos of everyday life.. (I am  photo bug also so makes me love Al more.)

I really got a wonderful perspective from their mothering experience and how it can help me.  I was able to spend some time with and they were really approachable and realistic.   Check out the Todays Moms facebook page or buy their book which is a compilation of there own and others stories they have gathered over the years.

Here are some key Mom points I learned from the TodaysMoms.

• It is a matter of deciding when is the time to shutdown  turn off the I-phone and be in the moment with your family.  the  tip leave in car during dinner time.-  which they learned from TheMomComplex share of info the todaymoms are.
• Don’t run your home like your career
• Let your children judge you,  as a way of erasing your guilt.  You might feel horrible about missing something with your kids. They might not necessarily feel the same way ..so ask them.
• When you look at your parenting look at it as a month rather then the day to day (helps to avoid the mommy guilt)

The Mommy Bites Summit is a event that is worth make the trip to NYC for a night of adult time. I would recommend it next year.

Thanks to MommyBites /  BabyBites for inviting me to the summit.  Thank you to the great vendors and sponsors LemiShine The hard water expert and Britax.

Disclosure:  I received entrance and gift bag from this event but the opinion stated in this post are of my own .

No Manners again..Loss of kids manners in Parents and kids I am back on my high horse. If you recalled I discussed manners for kids in a previous blog post Loss of manners

So I was out and  I watched a 3 year old girl spill a drink at the top of a staircase.  Dad was 5 feet away talking but facing the girl.  I watch another gentleman get a paper towel and clean it up.  Then she came and pushed the cup in a garbage can drink came back and spilled over the floor.  Dad at this point was 3 feet away.  Little girl knew she spilled and went and hid in Dads legs. Dad then kept talking and watched me clean up the mess, running for paper towels twice so that no one spilled on the linoleum floor.

I know that I am not always there when my kids have an accident but to so blatantly disregard it is rude… and to not say thank you for cleaning it up.

Kids Need to be taught to say thank you’s.

I have actually have had a discussion with my son regarding the need to say thank you.  We had it last year when I noticed a friend did not say thank you for me taking out for an entire day and lunch.

The discussion went ” M did you notice at no point did your friend say thank you?’

He said “I said thank you Mommy”

Me “I know you did buddy, you must always say thank you when people do something for you.  People go out of there way all the time and you must thank them for their efforts”

him” I know Mom,  I always say thank you”

Me ” Good and always do M”

Once Mrs.F  said to me “Do you know G said thank you to me without being told to do so?” make a reference to the fact I told my son to say thank you publicly.

Note: 5 minutes earlier I pulled aside the girl “G” told her” Make sure you thank to Mrs F”

I do always ask my kids to say did they say thank you. I know other people hear me asking but learning to say thank you is a learned behavior.  Being polite is good but if people are kind to you it is important to say “thank you”

What are your thoughts?

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Potty training age at the Superexhausted household was the dawning of a new day!   Here is the potty training methods that work for us.  We have 2 children and they both start potty training differently.

Potty training boys My son was a daycare kid, so he got with the potty  program by peer pressure.  The week he turned  3. We took away the diapers and he  had one accident while playing Candyland with his Nana. I know awesome!   jealous much.. (don’t be,  he did not sleep for 2 years- so his potty training was God way of saying “Go ahead have another,  I promise this one will be easy(not)”

the other …

Potty training girls my daughter was a stay at home potty training and she did not go down without a fight. When to start potty training?

• She used to hug her diapers say “she loved them”
• Me  saying “Princess  they are poopy holders.” and she did not find that gross…she still loved them
• Time for the diapers to go when she is sleeping with clean ones

Potty training weather: June it was warm, less clothes less laundry

Potty training age: She was 3 years 3 months (late for a girl, I know)

• I got tired of other people saying” She is a girl, why does she still have a diaper my daughter learned at 18 months?”
• My boy mom friends always said “Don’t worry Johnny was 3 ½,  when he learned”  That is why I am a boy mom.

How we Potty Trained:

So on this day in June, my husband comes downstairs and says “Sherry,  The Today show had a segment on a Natalie Morales who know as the Potty Whisper, we should try what she says”

• “Take her underwear away and give her a lot to drink and salt/sugar foods,  so she drinks more  the more she has to go more.”

I think simple… it sounds like a 3 year old on kid crack

• “The key was when she goes pee. You make them clean up the mess”…(you lay the paper towels, they do the actually wiping)

Great idea  3 year who is responsible …..it is like making college student pick up there clothes

• Positive reinforcement “You are doing great such a big girl”

Potty training method:  Is you have the child clean the  potty up every time,  they get tired of cleaning up, and use the potty.  A 3 year is still in the Mommy pleasing mode and they also want to be independent.

Potty training result: By the time my husband came home from work,  she was using the potty.. it took 3 day potty training  bootcamp. Bedtime took a little longer but not much after we cut late night drinks out.

(note: I cleaned the floors after she went to bed)

This post was inspired by shellthings potty training post share the link love.

How did you do it?

How I know I am raising an entrepreneurial kid. I spend all day working on my kids cape business and a better part of the night after the kids go to bed.  Because I love what I do.   I grew up in a family where my father was self made. My brother and brother in-law are self employed.  When I was 10 years old,  I was selling  Jam shorts to all my brothers friends and selling tee shirts to the surfer kids.  So I don’t know why I thought last night was so entertaining.

I am in the kitchen preparing dinner.

I see my 5  year old daughter coming up from our basement with a large box..

Me inquiring: “What you doing?”

Her: ” I am making a stand”

Me: “Well you can’t stand on that”

Her frustrated: “I know! not that kind of stand..you know a stand that holds stuff”

Next, She is in the kitchen pulling a chair over and getting a paper plate.

“Mommy, how do I make a dollar sign?”

Me: “it’s an S with 2 lines”

She leaves the room

I hear her running around

Next she yelling from the other room”Ok,  shop’s open come and buy”

I walk in and this is what I see….

I look at the paper plate  marked $3.00  so I quickly move to the head band..

Her: “That is $2.00 ”

Me ” But I bought them at the dollar store and it was 3 for $1.00″

She  say “Yea, but it cost “$2.00 in my shop,  I take cash”

…..

This morning she comes in my room, wakes me up and say “Mommy…. I want my $2.00”  and she wants the cash  no pretend money  here.

What has your kids sold you lately?

What has happen to decorum and manners with people? Today I was talking to a friend of mine, who said she was a at a Mirada Cosgrove concert last night. She took her daughter to get an autograph, while do so it became a push-fest. One mom even went to as far as telling 6 little girls to merge in the middle of the line “Sweets you just merge. This is how it is done.”

I take you back to a year ago during my towns Easter egg hunt. I watched in horror as parents of 2-4 years ran with kids to pick up eggs. Pushing my daughter down on the ground to get the coveted plastic pink egg filled with a tootsie roll. Really.

I too have been lacking at times, while at the post office my children walk up to the counter “Can I please have a piece of candy.” Diane a mature women, reminded my children to ask “How was your day Miss Diane.” Wait for her response, then offer she would offer them candy. Now every time they are much more polite and wait for it to be offered , I am thankful the lesson for the kids. It takes a village.

There is slight glimmers of hope but, the world has gone insane teaching our children that rudeness and lack of decorum is acceptable. The number of times people don’t hold a door, say please/thank you’s, or even the sales person who does not say thank you for your purchase. The joy of human interaction, making someone smile, or being thoughtful others is becoming lost art.

I challenge you to do one of the following and lead by Example of Good Manners:

1. Hold a door
2. Let someone cut in front of you in line at the store when you have a full cart Say
3. Hi to a stranger and tell them to have a good day
4. Stop if you see a someone broken down at the side of the road who is clearly struggling
5. When you says something don’t just give lip service say it with sincerity
6. Allow a car to merge in front of you
7. Rush less Be considerate
8. Tell someone if there pant fly is down
9. Tip properly and treat service people with dignity
10. Do not talk on cell phones inappropriate places.
11. Offer to get a drink or coffee for a coworker or spouse (even better a stranger)
12. Write a thank you note
13. Leave a comment on someone’s blog(we really like to hear)
14. Tell someone they look great even if it is a strangers. (make their day)
15. Please and thank you
16. Smile

Let me know what you do to instill manners?

This 2010 has been an awesome year because it was not last year and any thing is better than last year. One of these days I will discuss last year and how it changed my life  but for me it is not now. Last year is done and this year was amazing.

I am thankful for the following:

1. My family– I know a given
2. My health and family health, after 2009 this is a blessing that changed my life it is all good long as you are healthy
3. My husband being home-  He lost his job but it is a blessing,  because we have reconnected and I love having him around.
4. Our resilience as a family
5. Amazing new friends “that get you” no excuses necessary
6. Wonderful old friends that know where you have been and know you better than everyone because they know it all.
7. Our new dog Grundy– Got him the last days of 2009 but still a blessing-most days
8. A summer with family- Our permanent camping site- was a retreat  for all to relax and get away- it was also paid for prior to job loss-bonus
9. An amazing Bussiness that I love and so glad I own and it is all ours.
10. Strangers that show you a new way to give
11. Comfort level to be myself in spite of myself  and loving that I have the strength to do so.
12. Knowledge that I learn something new everyday.
13. Peace found in the eyes of a loved one.

What is it for you.. is this year good or not so good?    I want to hear your thoughts.